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Ben's blog

  • Stacking wood is art

    I feel like I’m creating something new every time. Or maybe I just have too much time on my hands.

  • Hive & a ton more snow

    I’m thinking about getting a snake scope to see if there’s any activity in there. I couldn’t hear anything by sticking my ear to the hive but they’ve slowed down so much I didn’t really expect to.

  • Generic English (U.S.) words and their sexual uses

    One phenomenon that is extremely confusing for non-native English speakers is how the most generic words can be used to mean something sexual. Whenever I speak I’m a a state of second guessing what I’m saying.

    • Do

    As in “I did her”. Do you have any idea how prevalent “do” is? It took me years to master it; getting all of its nuances is a true test of English mastery. The last thing it needs is a sexual meaning that is so easy to let out in the most benign conversations.

    • Have

    As in  “I’ll have her”. This one is actually hard to confuse with other uses of “have” as you rarely talk about a person belonging to another in any other context. But that’s a crazy common word.

    • Sleep with

    As in “I slept with her”. Did you have sex or did you just sleep in the same bed? Better not sleep in the same room as family or the conversation will be filled with incestuous innuendos.

    • Come

    “Ben, we’re leaving!” “I’m coming!” Does this mean I’m arriving now or later? God only knows.

    • Cock/Caulk

    If you are a gun enthusiast handyman raising poultry, don’t even try, find synonyms. These guys are pretty context specific but there are multiples of which they fit and as a result, they tend to show up a lot.

     

    Now to be fair, the only other language I’m intimate with (French) has some of the same sexual meanings associated with generic words, but they are fewer and formulated in a way that removes any ambiguity.

     

    Did I miss any?

     

  • Chicken patio

    Seems like Rhode Island Reds refuse categorically to have anything to do with the snow. I kinda felt bad that they were staying inside all day so I made them a little patio with the help of my sister. It’s removable and will be extended upon next season.

  • Hive & snow

    I hope they’re warm enough.

  • A little bit of Cold War era nostalgia

    A small town fallout shelter in the basement of a Vermont library. I may have played too many post-apocalyptic video games because I have an odd fascination for this stuff.

  • Mice in cars

    They made it into a 2000 Ford Focus, a 2005 Subaru Forester & a brand spanking new 2012 Suzuki SX4. They leave mouse shit everywhere, they literally take dumps non-stop. They even brought the poison I spread around the house into the cabin air filter these fucking little pricks.

    It’s an all out war and I’m not taking prisoners.

    First, I gave them back their poison, have fun not coagulating bitches.

    Second, all of these cars have a path that allows a small rodents into the cabin. The Focus & the SX4 was through the cabin air intake. I still don’t know how they make it into the Subaru.

    Here’s how to upgrade a 2012 Suzuki SX4 to have an armored air intake.

    Pro-tip I didn’t know, most cars’ cabin air intake is somewhere right bellow the windshield on the passenger side. Usually you need to remove the piece of plastic that is between the windshield and the hood as pictured bellow.

    A close up of the air intake and how completely unprotected it is.

    Now with protection, it looks pretty bad but it has done the job so far.

    Back in business

    Here’s how to access the intake from the inside, it gives you access to the air filter. You just need to remove the glove box first, no screws need to be removed.

    It’s pretty lame to post my dumb hack online but I’ve had an incredibly hard time finding any information about cabin air intakes for cars so I hope it’ll help someone.


    2016-10-17 edit: Commenter André shares the picture of his setup. Ingenious use of self drilling roofing screws!

    OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAAndré: ”we added a few more screws after this was taken to mold the wire mesh tight against the opening”

  • Chicken cam – back online!

    But with a serious loss of functionality. Given the internet connection that I have (cellular) I can’t reasonably set it up to do live streaming. I’ve also disabled interaction with the cam. What’s left is an image uploaded every hour. Not super duper cool but I’ll take what I can get in this neck of the woods.

    Hopefully this will get better when better internet is available.